The Reverend Sister Maria-Renate FCSF - Bethlehem Community
Forward into the future with Rainbow Lives
Whilst attending a one day Conference in York some time ago, entitled, “Over the rainbow, but not over the hill.” I sat and listened intently to the stories relating to personal experiences of Homophobic and Transphobic prejudice and exclusion within housing and residential care. Below is a summary of those experiences and the actions necessary to address these inequalities. . Names have been change for data protectionpurposes.
Even now, at 81 and with her memory beginning to fade, Gloria recalls her painful brush with bigotry and prejudice at a sheltered housing complex. Sitting in the communal lounge with those she considered friends, “people were laughing and making certain kinds of homophobic and Transphobic comments, and I told them, „Please don’t do that, because I’m gay.‟”
The result of her outspokenness, Gloria said, was swift and merciless. “Everyone looked horrified,” she said. No longer included in conversation or welcome at meals, she plunged into depression, medication did not help. With her emotional health deteriorating, Gloria moved to a different community nearby which is more LGBT friendly.
“I felt like I was a pariah,” she said, settled in her new home. “For me, it was a choice between life and death.”
Elderly gay people like Gloria, living in sheltered housing, residential/nursing care, or receiving home care, should not have to run the risk of being disrespected, shunned or mistreated in ways that range from hurtful to deadly. We heard the story of one openly gay man, without family or friends, who was moved into sheltered Accommodation. It was not long before he was moved off his floor to quiet the protests of other residents and their families. The particular housing association called upon an LGBT Advisory group who assured the 79-year-old man that a solution would be found, but he hanged himself before that solution was found. While this outcome is exceedingly rare, moving gay residents to placate others is common and one that promotes the thinking that homosexuality or transgender in unacceptable.
A 77-year-old lesbian who is out, said, she does not broadcast the fact, as it would feel unnatural to someone of her generation. She also uses a wheelchair, and has spent time in assisted-living centre and sheltered housing. There, she said, her guard was up all the time.
She came out to a few other residents in the assisted-living centre —professional women who she thought would accept her. But even with them, she said, “You don‟t talk about gay things.” Mostly, she kept to herself. “You learn size people up, only for the home help, I would be very lonely,” she said. “It would have been nice if someone else was out among the residents.”
We found when talking with the members of the Age Concern Liverpool & Sefton Silver Pride group for older LGBT, that such loneliness and isolation is a source of fear and dread.
During this same conference, comments were expressed like, “Why can we not have residential/care homes or sheltered accommodation for the gay, lesbian and Transgendered elderly.” This is something we seriously need to look into; we also need to make provision for same sex couples and those who have entered into civil partnerships who may wish to share a room within a residential nursing/care home. We now have the opportunity to affect change more effectively, thus ushering in a new age of elderly LGBT care.
There has been some activity of late with respect to articles and booklets which have sought to address some of the issues of older Gay, Lesbian and Bisexuals in relation to service provision, but none of these publications have sought to address the glaring imbalance in their writings by taking into consideration the on-going pain and distress of an even more marginalised peoples within the LGBT spectrum namely the Transgender community. Little thought is given to the unique situation of those who have transitioned whether surgically or in name only. These circumstances throw up new areas of deep concern for service providers in respect of legislation and the need for awareness training among managers and staff.
Support for such recommendations is strong, especially amongst those who have these immediate concerns. There is a pressing need for greater signposting to guide clients to LGBT approved housing Associations and residential/nursing care services; the Rainbow Lives Project in partnership with the Merseyside Navajo Charter Marking provides the necessary training and accreditation which in turn signals a compliance with all diversity legislation with respect to goods and services.
The plight of the gay, lesbian and transgender elderly was immediately flagged up by the Rainbow Lives Project, who are concerned about health inequalities and the lack of staff training especially around their statutory obligation to comply with present day legislation protecting the rights of LGBT people.
Rainbow Lives have begun this national drive to educate and inform housing associations and health care service providers using media productions produced by the Liverpool based film company First Take, which will also look at social isolation, and discrimination faced by older lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender tenants, nursing/care home residents, and those receiving care in the community.
One area of prime concern for the Rainbow Lives Project is the way in which older LGBT tenants or nursing/care home residents can legally protect themselves with respect to safeguarding their rights, is in the way application forms are worded. As these are confidential, the tick box section should include one which informs prospective tenants/residents that they (the Housing Association or nursing/care home) have diversity policies in place and full awareness training has been undertaken. The Rainbow Lives Project in partnership with the Merseyside Navajo Charter mark, are preparing training packages which will include up to date legislation which will enable service
providers to develop strong diversity policy for service users.
Some elderly LGBT people expressed how they have witnessed their partners and friends insulted or isolated due entirely to their sexual orientation or transgender. Others live in fear of the day when they too are dependent on care workers coming into their homes. That dread alone can be damaging, physically and emotionally say GP‟s, psychiatrists and social workers. There are many times when LGBT people avoid seeking help in health care situations because of their fears about how they‟ll be treated, unless they see affirming actions on the part of health care providers they‟ll always assume the worst.
Homophobia or Transphobia directed at elderly LGBT men and women has many faces, and it needs to be addressed whenever or wherever it manifests its „self; one of those areas of concern is home care provision for those still living in the community. An observation was noted from a community care nurse in relation to elderly LGBT care, who stated, “Care providers must remind their staff not to wear gloves at inappropriate times, for example while opening the front door or making the bed, when there is no evidence of H.I.V. infection as this can give the give the wrong impression.
This is another prime example of how the Rainbow Lives Project with the implementation of the Merseyside Navajo Charter Mark Training can help to prevent potentially distressing situations from occurring.
The most common reaction, in a generation accustomed to being in the closet, is a retreat back to the invisibility that was necessary for most of their lives, when homosexuality or transgender was considered both a crime and a mental illness. A partner is identified as a brother. No pictures or gay-themed books are left around, or transgendered friends are discouraged from visiting.
Elderly heterosexuals also suffer the indignities of old age, but not to the same extent, there is something special about having to hide this part of your identity at a time when your entire identity is threatened. This is a faster pathway to depression, failure to thrive and even premature death.”
The problem is compounded, experts say, because most of the elderly do not declare their Gay or Tran‟s identity, and sheltered housing or residential/nursing care communities rarely make an effort to find this out so as to prepare staff members and residents for what may be an unfamiliar situation. This needs to be addressed in various ways; one way is when interviewing a potential tenant or ressidential /nursing care resident on a one to one basis, who is contemplating a move, is to ask if gender or sexual orientation is something which needs to be discussed so that the housing association or Care home is properly informed so as to reduce the risk of any Transphobic or Homophobic situations arising.
Application forms have boxes to check for marital status and next of kin. But a concerted effort should be made to ensure that these boxes match the circumstances of Gay, Lesbian or Transgender, there is a need for suggested follow-up questions likes “do you have a specifically named person who you would wish us to contact in case of emergency.” There is always the scenario of the long term Gay, Lesbian or Transgender partner being left out of the loop when it comes to being kept informed of a loved one‟s ongoing care plan, by maintaining a rapport with the partner and respecting the right to privacy at all times.
It was a telling indictment of how health service providers were viewed by older LGBT people, when it came to asking older LGBT people about how they viewed the future, a same sex couple who have been together for two decades and who had a civil partnership in 2004, felt, should they need to re-house or enter a nursing/care home, or receive home care, they would be inclined to hide their gayness once again, as they did for half a lifetime, rather than face slurs and whispers, or leave themselves open to hate crime. “As strong as I am today,” one of them said, “when I‟m at the gate of sheltered accommodation the closet door is going to slam shut behind me.”
Reverend Sr. M. Renate.
Chaplain to the Bethlehem Community Liverpool,
Chair of the Liverpool LGBT Network,
Co-Chair of the In-Trust Network.
Co. Founder of Rainbow Lives and Silver Pride